Welcome to Two Crazy Ladies Love Romance
by Dolyn Keys
Sometimes sex is good. Sometimes it’s great. Sometimes it’s downright horrible.
It is in our nature to share our stories and experiences . . . even stories of our sexual escapades. Behind every story is a mysterious desire, a provocative arousal, or an embarrassing encounter that we pretend never happened. But what about those stories that make your toes curl and are too delicious not to share? Who doesn’t like to hear the dirty details?
From the embarrassing and funny to the mind-blowing and the amazing, dig your nails into the sexy stories of sEXperiences. Everyone has a story to tell . . .
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Tell us about Sexperiences.
Sexperiences is about about a female having multiple sexual encounters. Some encounters are hot and steamy, some are laughable, and some are both.
What initially inspired you to write Sexperiences?
I’m currently dating, and the idea of writing about different men and experiences came to me one day while I was driving.
What was the hardest part of writing this book?
I couldn’t stop laughing! It was so easy to write this book, because once my creativity kicked in the words just flowed out of me.
What was your favorite chapter (or part) to write and why?
My favoritie chapter was ‘Pushy” because dating was sooooooo hard in 2017. I kept wondering what was going to happen next, or what kind of guy I was going to meet next. So, the character I made up for ‘Pushy” is exactly the kind of guy I would probably run into.
What are your future project(s)?
I have to finish The RN Diaries Series. I also have ‘Sick Twisted Freak’ in the works. And I’m waiting to see if everyone loves reading sEXperiences as much as I LOVED writing it, and if requested by my readers I’ll def do a book II.
Is there anything else you would like to tell the readers about this book?
There isn’t a storyline for this book. Each chapter has a different man in it. It’s written to turn you on, make you laugh, and bring back some of those ‘stored’ memories of encounters we all have. So, sit back, grab a glass of wine, and your cell phone. Because, after you read some of these stories you’re going to want to call your closest friend and laugh!
So, at some point, you’ve got to come to terms that there aren’t any perfect men out there. However, there is a man that is perfect for you. We, as women, just have to be willing to dig through them all until we meet a man that’s worth a lifetime of our time and attention. We also have to deal with some things that we don’t want to... BLAH BLAH FUCKING BLAH! Some of that shit is true to a certain extent, but let me tell you about something that I just could not deal with.
I met Reginald while I was getting my car detailed. I was sitting under the umbrella in a lounge chair drinking a complimentary lemonade as he stared at me continuously. He was dressed in tan khakis, a light blue button down, blue blazer, and hush puppies. The square glasses he wore almost made him look like a stalker, but he spoke to me like a true gentleman.
“Is someone sitting here?” he asked as he took a seat in the lawn chair across from me.
“You are now,” I replied playfully.
Now, while Reginald was not at all my type, I was mentally subtracting the glasses, terrible serial killer attire, nervous‐ ness, and voila! He was Mr. GQ.
We sat there under the umbrella, sipping lemonade and getting to know each other. I noticed his lisp right away, but it didn’t bother me. I’d talked to a guy before that had a stut‐ ter. If I could deal with the stutter, the lisp was going to be tolerable.
The first three dates were wonderful, and I had developed quite the liking for Reggie. He’d also passed all of my requirements. Reggie was a thirty-four-year-old investment banker with no kids, a wide range of interests, a lot of money to blow, and he treated me like a lady. However, there was only one thing about him that I hadn’t checked into yet, and that was whether or not the sex was good. I mean, we’d kissed and cuddled. Hell, I even let him eat me out on the couch one night before I sent him home. We’d been all over each other. I’d felt his penis through his jeans, and from what I’d felt it was a good size. I just needed to verify if he was able to work it the way I’d imagine he could.
Reginald was a nerd to the core, pure gentleman, but dressed like he was headed to a geek convention. He even had pocket protectors to keep his button downs from getting ink stains. He wasn’t the package I’d expected my prince charming to come in. However, he was everything I needed him to be, and it was time to check that one little box off the list.
I’d invited him over to watch the Broncos and Steelers game. Men love football. We started on the couch, but we’d ended in the bedroom.
Reggie was good with his hands, his mouth was superb, and I laid there naked in bed waiting to see if he was just as good with his dick.
“How do you like it?” he whispered in my ear as he nibbled on my lobe and fondled my nipples with his fingertips.
“Any way I can get it. Just hurry up and put it in.” For fuck’s sake. I wanted this man to put my curiosity to rest. He’d surprised me on everything else, and I’d been glad that I hadn’t judged this book by its cover. However, I have to admit, I was silently praying that the sex was just as awesome as I’d imagined.
Reginald slid on the condom, and I got a look at what he had to offer. Long and thick, just as I’d felt through his clothes. When he slid between my legs my heartrate increased. He kissed me, and I closed my eyes and melted into the kiss.
He bit and pulled at my bottom lip, and though it was seduc‐ tive and sweet, my straightforwardness and anticipation wouldn’t allow me to enjoy it any longer. I broke the kiss and said, “Put me out of my misery already.”
He smirked, and reached down between the two of us. When he placed himself at my entrance, I clinched my walls, and as he slowly slid in inch by inch, I exhaled.
Each stroke was calculated, and the friction was so hypno‐ tizing I gripped his sides with my hands and pulled, wanting him as deep inside me as he could go. I gripped him as tight as I could and relished in watching his forehead wrinkle as he struggled to not moan like a bitch. I started to roll him over, get on top, and show him who was boss. But, the point was to see how well he could drive the pussy, and the ride wasn’t over yet.
I pulled my legs back as far as I could, and he grabbed both my hands and pulled them above my head. He looked me straight in my eyes and we both breathed heavily with each stroke. He sped up, and I dug my fingernails into the sheets. I was in a sex filled haze as he continued to hold my arms in place, bringing me closer to orgasm.
“Make me cum, Reginald.”
“Say please,” he replied.
Confidence. One of the things I hold in high regard in the bedroom. I thought about holding my shit together and refusing to succumb to his request, but I wanted this orgasm. So, I looked him right in the eye and said, “Please.”
He sped up, sliding into me so hard my body was slowly inching up the bed. He let my hands go and gripped the headboard, allowing him to slam into me harder and deeper.
I’d closed my eyes, and I was just about to cum when he asked, “Whose ‘pushy’ is this?”
My eyes sprang open, and my forehead wrinkled. His lisp hadn’t bothered me until he said that shit. It was the most unattractive thing he’d said to me since I’d met him. I closed my eyes again trying to bring my focus back to my orgasm. He continued to slam into me, and my body was headed back into the right direction when he said it again.
“Whose pushy is this?” he asked this time, and he accidentally spit on my cheek. He probably didn’t see it, but I sure as hell felt it.
That was it. I just looked at him. There were no wrinkles in my forehead, I was no longer turned on, and I really wanted him to get the fuck off me. I know it may sound ridiculous, but the shit sounded so goofy I almost thought I’d been fucking a cartoon character. Not to mention, he’d just showered me with bodily fluids, and it wasn’t the bodily fluids I’d signed up for.
My hands dropped from his back, and I took one of my hands and wiped the spit from my face.
“Is ‘shumthing’ the matter?”
Oh God! I thought. Now my brain was magnifying everything he said. Each word he spoke was now making him more and more unattractive.
“No. I’m fine. I just came,” I said. I thought about adding, “Aside from you showering me with a little of your saliva and speaking to me like Elmer Fudd, everything is just fine.” But he hadn’t done anything wrong. Nothing had really changed. Perhaps it was all in my head? I put my hands back onto his back, and gave him a slight smile and told him to cum.
I was really trying to hold on so that he could get off, but if he’d have asked me one more time about my ‘pushy’ I wasn’t going to be able to take it.
He finally came, and I was relieved. He pulled himself from me, and got up to go into the bedroom. Not wanting him to try and stay and cuddle, I immediately let him know I had a lot to do. Which is code for please leave.
I lay sprawled across the bed and hit him with the classic, “So, what are you about to do.”
He didn’t say anything. He grabbed his pants and stepped into them. Perhaps he was waiting on me to say something else, but I didn’t.
When he realized I wasn’t, he spoke, “I know what that means. Just tell me, is that all you wanted from me. Just to fuck? Because we could have gotten that shit out of the way a long time ago.”
I chewed the inside of my lip. I thought about my response. If I said yes, that made me a terrible person, but it could’ve easily gotten rid of him. If I said no, I ran the risk of him asking to stay and calling me again. So, what did I do? I pulled out my man persona and vaguely answered the ques‐ tion so that he would get the fuck out.
“I’m just tired, and I have a lot to do. Is that a problem?” Men love to answer the question without answering the question. The smarter ones even ask a question to put the ball back in your court so they don’t feel bad. That was me in this case.
“No, not a problem.” He finished getting dressed, and grabbed his jacket and keys. Then he walked over to the bed and kissed me on the cheek. “Call me when you get done.”
Let’s not forget that Reggie was no dumbass either. He threw the ball back into my court again. If I said okay, and then call, it means I want to continue. If I say I’m going to call, but I don’t, it makes me an asshole. So, I didn’t say whether I would or not. I simply replied, “Have a good night.”
I lay there in the bed covered with my sheet until I heard the door close. When I heard the confirmation that he was gone, I sprang out of bed to lock the door. I went into the bath‐ room and turned the shower on. I stood there in the mirror looking at myself. I covered my mouth with my hand as I shook my head, and then I simply couldn’t resist repeating the statement that stopped my orgasm dead in its tracks.
“Whose pushy is this?” I laughed to myself a little as I shook my head. Then, I grabbed a wash cloth from my cabinet and stepped into the shower to wash ‘my pushy’.
Author Dolyn Keys is a writer of sexy, romantic, and suspenseful novels with a hint of comedy. She brings characters to life through her writing, who often mimic much of her personality: BLUNT, SEXY, CLASSY, and a little CRAZY! Dolyn is a registered nurse, whose career inspired her first published series The RN Diaries. She describes writing as a way to express herself. Dolyn lets her imagination run wild while entertaining her readers and reaching them on personal levels with plot twists, daring characters, and excitement. Her inspiration comes from being an avid reader of erotic novels. From there, she decided that it was time to make a change from being a reader to being a writer, and she’s now dazzling the world with her racy and whimsical stories.